Random (A)Musings

Hard Work

Working hard? Or hard at work? Either way, the key word is "hard."

 

From Vice Fashion - Work Hard Play Hard via The Frisky 

Back in the Land of "Mad Men": Season 3 Premiere

You know you're back in the land of "Mad Men" when . . . Betty says of her young daughter, "She's taken to your tools like a little lesbian" and no one bats an eye.

You know you're back in the land of "Mad Men" when . . . Don actually uses his storytelling powers for good (for once!)—to relieve Betty's pregnancy discomfort by visualizing a beach scene—and she compliments him on how well he makes things up.

You know you're back in the land of "Mad Men" when . . . Salvatore finally (finally!) accepts an embrace from another man and his fountain pen explodes. And he's not wearing a pocket protector. And then the fire alarm goes off.

You know you're back in the land of "Mad Men" when . . . It turns out that Don's real name—"Dick"—was bestowed "after a wish his mother should have lived to see": that if his miscreant father got her pregnant she'd cut off his dick and boil it in oil.

Welcome back, Mad Men!

Random Penises

Strange men are always talking at me about their penises.

"Strange" as in I've-never-met-them AND "strange" as in, I-don't-WANT-to-meet-them-and-please-don't-sit-next-to-me. Ever.

First it was Viagra ads. Then Cialis and Levitra. Then ExtenZe and Enzyte — which I actually thought were the same thing for a long time, cuz the weird guys in the ads look exactly alike.

Which is to say, they look like brainwashed cult members who never blink. Which is to say, guys who never actually need an erection for any practical purpose.

Guys, seriously . . . if we've never met, I don't care about your penises. I don't care what size they are. I don't care how firm they are. And I really, really, REALLY don't care who they're attached to.

So please stop talking at me about your penises!

Thank you.